Tuesday, December 30, 2008

All I want for Post-Christmas/Boxing Week/New Years is an e-mail/cellphone plan

My requirements are simple:

- I need to speak on the phone

- I need to read and write e-mails

- I need to send and receive text messages

- I need to have voicemail

Ideally, I would also have:

- the ability to, very occasionally, browse the web

- the ability to read and write RTF and PDF documents

What's stopping me? Well, for one thing, I can't for the life of me find a plan that does what it says it does. Example: half the plans that say "data" don't include data. Half the phones are sold out.

That's it. I'm going to have to go... *sigh* ...into a store.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Awesome Courage Campaign Photo Petition

Access it HERE

Infamous prosecutor Ken Starr has filed a legal brief -- on behalf of the "Yes on 8" campaign -- to nullify the 18,000 same-sex marriages performed in California between May and November of 2008.

It's time to put a face to Ken Starr's shameful legal proceedings. To put a face to the 18,000 couples facing forcible divorce. To put a face to marriage equality. Because, gay or straight, YOU are the face of the Marriage Equality Movement.

My favourite is the one with the sign saying "If 1 John 4:16 then Mark 10:9. Q.E.D."

All the loving and long lasting couples and all their supporters make an eloquent plea against forcible divorce, which is a concept so self-indulgently sadistic that I wonder how Ken Starr or his backers can sleep at night.

Hat tip to Joe.My.God.

Best comment on PoMo EVAR

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Recommendation FAIL

So y'all, I intended to use this post to introduce The Non-Adventures of Wonderella (which I am clearly still doing) but sadly there are no buttons or banners or suchlike with which to give a preview. So um, go look for yourself?

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Get thee to a nunnery?

In a perfect world (perfectly lazy world, I suppose) I would not nothing but read and watch TV, and knit and cross-stitch. I have the heavily romanticized idea that this is what it would be like to be a nun.


I don't mind work, but the whole existential, making-something-of-myself deal is harshing my cross-stitch buzz.

Monday, December 08, 2008

Christmas All Over Again

Here's my favourites. Bring it, mall muzak!

"Merry Christmas Baby" - Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band

"I Saw Three Ships" - Sting

"Christmas Song" - Dave Matthews, Tim Reynolds

"Please Come Home For Christmas" - Jon Bon Jovi

"Christmas All Over Again" - Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers

"Christmas Day" - Dido

"Song for a Winter's Night" - Sarah McLachlan

"Santa Claus is Coming to Town" - The Pointer Sisters

"Ave Maria" - Pavarotti

"Happy Xmas (War Is Over)" - John And Yoko

"Mele Kalikimaka" - The Andrews Sisters, Bing Crosby, Vic Schoen

"Silver Bells" - Stevie Wonder

"Santa Baby" - Madonna

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" - Mariah Carey

"Blue Christmas" - Elvis Presley

"Feliz Navidad" - José Feliciano

"It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas" - Johnny Mathis

"(There's No Place Like) Home for the Holidays" - Perry Como

"Last Christmas" - Wham!

"Silent Night, Holy Night" - Mahalia Jackson

"Peace on Earth/Little Drummer Boy" - David Bowie and Bing Crosby

"Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree" - Brenda Lee

"River" - Robert Downey Jr. or Sarah McLachlan

"What Christmas Means to Me" - Stevie Wonder

"Chanukah Song" - Adam Sandler

"Hey Santa" - Bowser & Blue

"Merry Fucking Christmas" - South Park

"The Christmas Song (Chestnuts Roasting) - Nat King Cole

"Walkin' Round in Women's Underware" - Bob Rivers

"Winter Wonderland" - Eurythmics or Dolly Parton


"Huron Carol"

"Baby, It's Cold Outside"

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas"

"I'll Be Home for Christmas"

"It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year"

"What Child Is This?"

"Mary's Boy Child"

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Phrase of the YEAR

Care of How I Met Your Mother:


For example:

Barney: [To Ted] Do you have some puritanical hang up on prostitution? Dude, it’s the world’s oldest profession.

Marshall: Do you really think that’s true?

Barney: Oh yeah, I bet even Cro-Magnons used to give cave hookers an extra fish for putting out.

Marshall: Ah ha, so the oldest profession would be fishermen. Kaboom! You’ve been lawyered!


Barney: That’s adorable Ted. You’re such a hayseed. The companionship business is the growth industry of the 21st century. You do realize that 1 out of every 8 adult women in America is a prostitute.

Marshall: Dude you just made that up.

Barney: Withdrawn.

Marshall: Lawyered!